Japanese wedding gifts 結婚祝いのプレゼント
No room for error
Have you been invited to a wedding in Japan, but you have no idea what gift to choose for the occasion? Here are some great ideas!
Marriage in Japan is a very important institution, the majority of Japanese couples pass the ring on their finger. As proof, only 2% of births in Japan take place outside marriage.
The ceremony is therefore very common in the archipelago, but it is also very codified.
To read: Marriage in Japan
A Codified Ceremony
The bride and groom can choose to marry traditionally, at the temple or the shrine, to opt for a Western-style wedding which takes place in a chapel, but also to organize only a small ceremony with families and friends, secular ceremonies.
Depending on the ceremony you attend, your gift will not be the same. Indeed, during a traditional wedding, it is very frowned upon to offer a gift to the bride and groom. No wedding list is created by the future spouses and it would be very inappropriate to arrive with your arms full of small presents, even if you have all the best intentions in the world.
Thus, traditionally, at Japanese weddings, the guests offer money to the bride and groom.
Only the people closest to the family (parents, brothers, sisters, etc.) offer gifts to the spouses, especially during the official reception called Hiroen.
Shugibukuro
If you are not part of the first family circle, then you will be invited for the second part of the wedding, Nijikai, which is more festive and where friends very often meet.
It is therefore customary to offer money, placed in a small envelope specially dedicated to this purpose called shugibukuro. These envelopes are richly decorated and surrounded by a small knot in gold and silver paper cord, impossible to untie, symbolizing eternal union.
Choose Your Envelope Well
To find them, nothing could be simpler: the majority of stationery stores in Japan sell them. There are different sizes, each corresponding in proportion to the amount you want to offer to the bride and groom. Be careful though, be sure to pronounce the word kekkon-iwai ("celebration/wedding gift") correctly so that you are shown the correct envelopes because there are also envelopes in every way similar for those who will not pay attention, but which whose node is placed lower, and which, these, are reserved for the deaths.
It is then customary to write his name on the envelope. Often, stationers offer a calligraphy service to write your name very delicately on the envelope. A little attention that will surely delight the bride and groom. During the ceremony, you will find at the entrance of the room a small basket which is used to collect these envelopes, you will only have to deposit yours there.
If you are participating in a secular ceremony, it is always good form to offer a shugibukuro. However, the less formal nature of the ceremony can allow you to offer a small more personalized gift, such as a small souvenir from your country of origin that the bride and groom can keep preciously at home. Here again, it is not a question of making a too substantial gift, but rather small attention, inexpensive, which will delight the hearts of the bride and groom. In Japan, seeing a foreign friend come especially to the wedding is already proof of a great friendship, receiving an overly expensive gift would put the bride and groom in embarrassment.
Long live the brides!